A Clockwork Malchick

Fri, 12 May 2006 17:35:10 GMT

Freudian Inventory Results

Oral (36%) you appear to be stubbornly and irrationally against receiving help even when it might be the more intelligent option.
Anal (16%) you appear to be overly lacking in self control and organization, and possibly have a compulsive need to defy authority. If you are too scatterbrained, you will not develop much as a person as you will habitually switch paths before you ever learn anything.
Phallic (90%) you appear to have issues with controlling your sexual desires and possibly fidelity.
Latency (66%) you appear to be afraid or averse to present or future real world responsibilities, this will only make your inevitable transition more difficult, so learn to deal with the real world.
Genital (40%) you appear to be somewhere between a progressive/openminded and regressive/closeminded outlook on life.

Take Free Freudian Inventory Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Bandwagon (OOC)

Tue, 07 Mar 2006 02:17:50 GMT

If you read this, tell me one thing you want to do with me someday.

Then put it up in your own jounal to see what people would like to do with you.

PART B: I am awake and alive. But sadly lacking in free time. Comment here also if you want to do something with Alex. I just mean, post here if you ever need me for anything and I'll hop on by. Planning and suchlike, droogs.

~Alex

Sun, 26 Feb 2006 23:33:49 GMT

You Are 98% Evil

You're the most evil person you know.
The devil is even a little scared of you!

How Evil Are You?

Memememememem

Wed, 15 Feb 2006 13:13:04 GMT

Hey whut. It's the old "What do you think about Alex"? Meme.

That is, Yzak's meme.

What kind of person do you think he is?

Thu, 09 Feb 2006 06:02:38 GMT

Your Ultimate Purity Test 2.0 Score Is...
	Your Score:	Average For All Users	Average For All ( total)
Dating	42.31%	33.63%	Dated seriously
Self-Lovin'	37.88%	61.5%	When I think about you - or anyone - I touch myself
Shamelessness	61.29%	77.81%	It takes a couple of drinks
Sex Drive	14.29%	75.7%	Humps fire hydrants when nobody's looking
Straightness	33.33%	40.23%	Experienced, but with room to grow
Gayness	92.59%	78.95%	Repressed, are we?
Dominant	98.33%	87.36%	Afraid to cross at "Don't Walk" signs
Submissive	92.06%	87.78%	Submits to no one... almost
Fucking Sick	83.67%	90.24%	Refreshingly normal
Total Score	66.16%	74.31%
Take The Ultimate Purity Test 2.0 and see how you match up! (By The Ferrett)

Wed, 08 Feb 2006 00:20:06 GMT

After this week I *SHOULD* have some time freed up. Then I should be able to get back into the groove of things.

*crosses fingers*

Sat, 04 Feb 2006 04:20:59 GMT

I will get Alex up and running. I will. I WILL, DAMMIT!

Mon, 30 Jan 2006 06:35:26 GMT

FYI
Because I have a horrible tendancy to rape Camp Canon, here are some things that I am responsible for tossing into this game:

The Lake has:

-The Lake Monster
-Ruins (home to the Lady of the Lake)
-The Lady of the Lake (who lobbed the Excalibur at Goku)
-The Yellow Sign
-The gladius of Gaius Julius Caeser Germanicus AKA "Caligula"

The woods now have, somewhere deep in them:

-The corpse of the Byakhee

And of course anything anybody adds over the course of the game. But Alex's little excursions are usually sub-radar (I like sub-plots D:) so I'm just posting this publicly in case anybody wants to use these things some time. ^^; I am not saying these are the only things out there. These are just things Alex himself has seen or is responsible for.

-Alex
(I will try to stop messing with Camp canon, I swear D:)

Fri, 27 Jan 2006 03:12:49 GMT

Which Historical Lunatic Are You?
From the fecund loins of Rum and Monkey.

I have a strange urge to turn Alex into Caligula now. It works on more levels than you know. . .

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 17:56:13 GMT

Oh Great Cthulhu!

I have been an extremely diligent devotee this year.

In July, I called down the wrath of Yog-Sothoth upon latrine_orderly (65 points). In October, I sacrificed reyflection to Cthulhu (500 points). In January, I wore an Elder Sign (-10 points). In April, I recruited latrine_orderly as a new cultist (30 points). In August, I visited my relatives in Innsmouth (100 points). In September, I burnt my copy of the Necronomicon (-75 points).

In short, I have been very good (610 points) and deserve the honour of having my body used as a host for one of your servitors.

Your humble and obedient servant,
heaven_shark

Submit your own plea to Cthulhu!

. . .Close enough. But I'm pretty sure I worshipped Hastur. . .

OH, CRAP! I SAID HIS NAME! RUN!

Color Quiz, IC

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 04:16:53 GMT

http://www.colorquiz.com/

Existing Situation
Sensuous. Inclined to luxuriate in the things which give gratification to the senses, but rejects anything tasteless, vulgar, or coarse.

Stress Sources
Has lost the resilience and strength of will necessary to contend with existing difficulties, which appear to him as deliberate opposition. Stands his ground, but is subjected to intolerable pressure. Needs cooperation and emotional fulfillment and feels that, in their absence, there is nothing he can do to improve the current situation. Wants to 'get away from it all' quickly.

Restrained Characteristics
Willing to become emotionally involved as he feels rater isolated and alone. Egocentric and therefore quick to take offense, though he tries to avoid open conflict.
Egocentric and therefore quick to take offense. Able to obtain physical satisfaction from sexual activity but tends to hold aloof emotionally.

Desired Objective
Considers the existing circumstances disagreeable and over-demanding. Refuses to allow anything to influence his point of view.

Actual Problem
Anxiety and a restless dissatisfaction, either with circumstances or with unfulfilled emotional requirements, have produced considerable stress. He reacts by putting this down to a total lack of understanding on the part of others, and by adopting a scornful and defiant attitude.

Actual Problem #2
The tensions induced by trying to cope with conditions which are really beyond his capabilities, or reserves of strength, have led to considerable anxiety and a sense of personal (but unadmitted) inadequacy. His inability to enforce his will causes him to over-react in stubborn defiance and by assigning to others all the blame for his own failures.

Tue, 24 Jan 2006 01:54:24 GMT

Hoorah for dry spells of creativity. I swear I thought very seriously tonight about permanently offing my character and trying for someone else next app round.

Alex just hasn't been in his usual sort of groove lately.

Hurhurhur. Going back to classes will either help or destroy this situation.

I won't drop him, of course. I'd regret it later.

Write Up: Alex's More Complex Relationships (I am bored STFU)

Sat, 14 Jan 2006 04:57:21 GMT

This being a write up of those people who have managed to form. . .weird ass relationships with Camp's resident Spherical Bastard. I still need to add Gwendal and Mal, whom Alex has mixed feelings about Heh.

DROOGS

Son Goku
Does this boy have a volume setting lower than "Mute"?

Alex and Goku first started hanging out under rather peculiar circumstances: Flirting during Halloween when Goku was Gothic Lolita and Alex was cursed with vampirism and all of the fun Anne Rice-like bisexuality that goes with it. They quickly forgot about this, though, when they continued to talk after that (though the Mistletoe did give them the occassional awkward moment). Alex saw a bit of home in Goku; Goku reminded him of Dim. He was older, stronger and more clueless than Alex was. So Alex took the older boy under his wing as a "droog".

Goku is the only person that Alex confides in. Goku doesn't judge him and Alex doesn't mind the occassional tolchock. He just wishes that Goku would give up on Stan since he sees that as Goku's only major sign of weakness. That Stan and Alex have never quite gotten along (they're both far too stubborn), doesn't help the situation any.

Goku has plainly stated that he will be angry if Alex ever gets himself killed. Since most other campers, and counselors, have bluntly told Alex to roll over and die this is a major plus.

Excel-Junior Droog
Never underestimate the power of pointless violence

Excel is one of three girls at Camp that Alex hasn't flirted with. While his eyes register her as female his mind seems to have decided that her gender is simply "Excel". As such his relationship with her, young as it is, is a Droog-y one.

Excel is probably more important to Alex than he is to her. He considers her to be one of the few people he can let his hair down around, since she sympathizes with his need to be violent. Since he can be clingy when it comes to his scarce few allies, he was rather upset with her wedding and part of him probably felt betrayed. The whole thing just didn't seem in keeping with the ultra-violent person he knew. So he rushed up and punched Excel in the face to snap her out of it. He got a few punches himself in return but he would do it again in a heart beat. In his own Alex-y mind he was helping.

River Tam-Junior Droog
Why do you love me!?

The second of the three girls that Alex doesn't flirt with. When Alex first met River he felt she wasn't all there but soon after managed to sense that she knew. . .stuff. He feels he can let his hair down around her without someone strangling him to death with it because she seems to understand him. He can't understand her but she seems to understand him and not see him as evil. She was the first person he saw after coming out of the Yellow Sign curse, and alot of that awakening was thanks to her. Granted, she continue to beat on him until he was senseless but when he woke up in the hospital she just stroked his hair. For someone whose whole language consisted of violence, this was a surprise and not entirely an unwelcome one. He always loves attention, he's just used to it being the negative kind.

COUNSELORS

Arsène Lupin III
A friendly foe he was to me
A cunning old adversary

To the casual observor this one is simple: They hate eachother. That would be a correct interpretation but as always things are complicated on Alex's end. As he said to Kira "Enemies are one thing, it's droogs you have to watch out for, you never know when they will turn on thee". With that as a guiding principle, Alex keeps his enemies closer than his friends and he gets a kick out of rivalries.

He pegged Lupin as a worthy cause to fight against the night Lupin slept in his tree. The need to be rivals with him increased the more he saw himself reflected in the older man. Since then Alex has been thrashing Lupin more and more until he finally went for the man's wolf tail in an attempt to cut it off. This was the last straw for Lupin. And while Alex went about the thing in his characteristic "wrong way", he was trying to help so Lupin's shunning him afterwards made him feel hurt a little (not that Alex didn't deserve it). He just has violent, stupid ways of "helping" sometimes (re: punched Excel in the face at her own wedding). He knows Lupin would dance on his grave if he ever died and the awkward truth is that Alex himself might take a bullet for Lupin just due to that connection he still feels. The fact that Alex has considered killing himself just to see what it's like doesn't hurt.

Izumi Curtis
Not the mommy?

The third woman Alex doesn't flirt with. Alex's parents fail at life. They aren't abusive but he has them cowering in fear of him and obeying his every whim. If they get too inquisitive he pays them off. Izumi, however, is assertive towards him. Something deep down inside of Alex falls before Izumi each time she tells him to do something.

Since he first really started talking to her while sleepwalking in a nightmare, their relationship is pretty odd. He was asleep and she comforted him and that subconscious part of him attatched to her as a parental figure. There never seems to be any malice behind her demands of him, most of them are for his own good. She so far hasn't had to use physical violence against him (except for during the Yellow Sign episode). He just quietly does as she says. There is definitely something Freudian going on here.

Thu, 12 Jan 2006 23:03:12 GMT

Relationship list updated!

(Yaaay!)

If you're not there and think you should be then give me a poke.

Social Dysfunction Meme/And, belatedly, the 2005 meme~IC

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 21:49:29 GMT

Your Social Dysfunction:
Narcissistic

You are very self-important, preoccupied with success fantasies, expect special treatment and lack interpersonal empathy.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Please note that we aren't, nor do we claim to be, psychologists. This quiz is for fun and entertainment only. Try not to freak out about your results.

. . .Bah. What do these know, anyway?

In 2005 I have:
[x] stayed single
[x] got kissed
[x] kissed someone new
[x] made out
[x] made out in a car
[x] kissed in the snow
[x] kissed in the rain
[ ] fell in love
[ ] fell in love with a fool
[ ] had my heart broken
[ ] broke someone else's heart
[x] had a stalker
[ ] had a good relationship with someone
[ ] questioned my sexual orientation
[ ] came out of my closet
[ ] got pregnant
[ ] had an abortion
[ ] got married
[ ] had a divorce
[x] kissed someone of the same sex (Not while in my right rassoodock, mind. . .)
[ ] dated someone that I will never forget
[ ] did something I regret (. . .I regret nothing.)
[ ] lost my true love
[ ] lost faith in love
[x] kissed under mistletoe (. . .Who in Camp hasn't? Really. . .)
[ ] got a promotion
[ ] got a pay raise
[ ] changed jobs
[ ] lost my job
[ ] quit my job
[ ] dated a co- woker
[ ] dated my boss
[ ] dated my boss's son/ daughter
[ ] got fired from my job
[ ] got straight A's
[x] met a teacher who I became friends with (and a counselor)
[x] met a teacher who I really hate (and a counselor)
[ ] found the subject I love
[x] failed a class
[x] cut class
[x] skipped school
[x] got in a fight with a classmate (and another camper. . .)
[x] did something I was proud of
[ ] discovered a new talent
[x] proved myself an idiot
[x] embarrassed myself in front of the Camp
[ ] fell in love with a teacher
[ ] got the lead role in the school play
[ ] made a varsity team
[x] was involved in something that I will never forget
[ ] painted a picture
[x] wrote a poem
[x] ran a mile
[x] listened to music I couldnt stand
[x] double dipped
[x] skinny dipped
[x] went to a sleepover (Does crashing one count? . . .It counts.)
[x] went to camp (Big mistake)
[x] threw a suprise party (For Christmas. . .nobody came. You all suck.)
[x] laughed till I cried
[ ] laughed till I peed my pants
[x] flirted shamelessly
[x] visited a foreign country (America!)
[x] visited a foreign state
[ ] cooked a disastrous meal
[x] lost something important to me
[ ] got a gift I love
[x] realized something new about myself
[x] went on a diet
[ ] tried to gain weight
[x] dyed my hair
[x] came close to losing my life
[ ] someone close to me died
[x] went to a wild party
[x] drank alcohol
[x] drank alcohol underage
[x] got drunk
[ ] got arrested
[ ] read a great book
[x] saw a great movie
[ ] saw a movie so scary that it made me cry
[ ] saw a favorite band live
[ ] did something that I want to tell everyone
[x] experienced something new
[x] made new friends
[ ] found out who your real friends are
[x] lied to your parents
[x] snuck out
[x] got in trouble with police
[x] kissed in the rain
[x] kissed in a pool
[x] kissed under the stars
[ ] smoked for the first time (Not my first raz, no)
[ ] did illegal drugs for the first time (Did do drugs. Not for the first time, though)
[x] got wasted
[x] went to a party
[ ] had the time of your life
[x] danced
[ ] fell in love
[ ] fell out of love
[ ] had a crush on someone
[ ] changed your sexual preferance
[x] swam in a pool
[ ] made a snowman
[ ] went snowboaring
[ ] went sledding
[x] slept in past 2 pm
[ ] held someones hand that you care about
[x] had a fling or relationship with someone
[x] got wasted in a public place
[ ] got wasted in Mexico
[ ] told someone you like them as more than a friend
[x] gone on vacation
[ ] gone on vacation with a friend
[x] driven a car
[x] played strip poker (Won)
[x] danced in the rain
[x] got in a car accident
[x] seen someone get in a car accident
[x] got in a fist fight
[x] laughed untill you couldn't breathe
[ ] had an amazing year
[x] missed someone
[x] sent someone to the hospital
[x] made out with a stranger
[ ] got a new pet
[ ] enjoyed this year overall

Easier for me. I wasn't in this bezoomny mesto most of 2005. Memories. . .I miss London.

Guess I'm going to Hell.

Fri, 06 Jan 2006 18:54:22 GMT

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Ninth Level of Hell - Cocytus!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Extreme
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Extreme
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Extreme
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	High
Level 7 (Violent)	Extreme
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Extreme
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Extreme

Take the Dante's Inferno Test

In the New Year I hope to. . .

Mon, 02 Jan 2006 19:09:46 GMT

In CFUD I've been kinda up-playing Alex's creepy, brutish side. I realize, though, that has almost completely cost me his suave, charming side. Alex, canonically, makes good first impressions on people and lures them into his web of lies before crushing them. Only then do they realize how much of an utter disaster of a human being he is. I think he dropped masquerade when he arrived in Camp because he realized that Camp isn't exactly "society". Everyone around seemed just as sleezy as he was.

Alex is already on the bad side of about 3/4 of Camp so he will start working his charm on new campers. My excuse for him going back to his old masquerade is fairly simple: He's only been here for two and a half months and he's already been beaten up over ten times and hospitalized three times. It's an act of self-preservation if you will. He'll be doing it out of fear of physical pain.

Those in Camp who already know him for the creature he is need not worry. If you catch him alone he'll still thrash you. He probably will still thrash you in public too and conjure up a complex excuse later.

Mind this isn't a full conversion. He'll STILL be a thug, just a bit less in-your-face about it. But only a little less.

My Canon's Influence on our Pop Cultural Lives Part II

Wed, 21 Dec 2005 07:04:40 GMT

(Originally posted on CFO, reposted here. Part I was a general summary.)

Anyway, if you think you've seen my character somewhere before then don't think yourself mad. . .you probably have. Many movies, books, and crap tons of music have referenced my canon for the last fourty-some-odd years.

For great justice, I shall share some of it with you.

First there are the books. Some books etc that have referenced me are:

A Clockwork Testament by Anthony Burgess (a fictional novel about a man who is trying to make a movie better than ACO. Incestuous, Anthony, you weirdo)
A Cockwork Orange by. . .I dunno. It's gay porn. Redundant, I know.
Johnny the Homicidal Maniac by Jhonen Vasquez. Johnny is Alex-progeny. He even kills while listening to the Ode at one point. There are also some references to the Ludovico Technique here and there.
Marvel Knights-Elektra #12 Ludovico reference.
Ambient by Jack Womack. Clockwork-Progeny fiction. One of the covers uses the ACO font too.
1984 A Clockwork Orange by Sam J. Lundwall.

Now, Movies. There are ALOT of these so I'll just list the films that are considered to be Clockwork Progeny by most critics. You've probably seen alot of these:

Animal Room
Fight Club
La Gang Dell' Arancia Meccanica
Murder in a Blue World
American Psycho
Natural Born Killers
Romper Stomper
Tales from the Hood (last tale)
The Young Poisoner's Handbook
Trainspotting
American History X

Cartoons and TV shows! Okay, I don't watch much TV but I have seen my canon referenced in:

The Simpsons (frequently, actually)
South Park
Captain Simian and the Space Monkeys (more than you'd like to think, apparently.)
The Daily Show with John Stewart
Invader ZIM (Ludovico reference)
The Man Show
The Tom Green Show
Ren & Stimpy

---

And music. . .Okay music absolutely loves Alex. And I will have a few lists here.

First and foremost there is a subgenre of music known as Oi! which is the progenitor of streetpunk. Oi!/Streetpunk seems to adore A Clockwork Orange since the movement began in the 70s in England, shortly after the movie came out. And then there is an Oi!/Streetpunk subgenre known as "Clockie". Clockie bands are based on A Clockwork Orange in their dress, their names, their lyrics or, frequently, a combination of those. Think that there aren't enough of such bands to warrant a subgenre? Think again.

Some Clockie Bands:
The Adicts
Major Accident
Clockwork Orange
The Clockwork Oranges
Clockwork Crew
Clockwork Psycho
The Clockwork Soldiers
The Devotchkas
Droogs
Durango 95
The Horrorshow Malchicks
The Lower Class Brats
Moloko Men
Morte Cerebral
The Violators
Ultra Violence
Blitz
Agent Bulldogg
4Skins

Whew, that's alot. BUT WAIT! My canon's influence on music doesn't end there. Above and beyond the Clockies there are groups that have songs devoted to my canon or are named after my canon but aren't considered Clockie because either they don't show THAT much devotion. . .or are simply not streetpunk.

Groups that are either named after my canon or have a song or two devoted to/referencing my canon:
Die Toten Hosen
The Warriors
Templars
Heaven 17 (named after a band in my canon)
The Strawberry Alarm Clock (named after my canon novel and "Strawberry Feilds Forever" some say)
Turbonegro
Band of Pain
Red Red Groovy (name)
Rob Zombie
The Ramones
Mad Parade
Chapter 21 (name)
Los Violadores
Cock Sparrer
Cage
The Choice
Blank Generation
The Beastie Boys
Campag Velocet (name)
The Betrayed
Alice Cooper (name. . .and general state of being)
Angelic Upstarts
Banned from U.N.C.L.E.
Mysclovits

Whew, that was alot too.

BUT NOW MORE! These are the bands and artists who don't have songs or bandnames referencing my canon directly but who reference it in their music videos or stage productions or clothes once or twice:
Blur
The Alarm
Alphaville
Usher
Eminem
Orbital
Janet Jackson (the halftime show with the Boob Seen 'Round the World, actually)
My Chemical Romance
Megadeth
Madonna
Malice Mizer
Guns N' Roses

AND THAT IS ALL (until "My Canon's Influence on Our Popcultural Lives Part III")! Luckily I compiled those music lists off of other lists around the web otherwise I'd be worried about myself. Some things I did add though D:

Praise Bog

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 14:26:25 GMT

HOORAH! Alex's new LJ layout! SHE IS COMPLETE!

I may do the occassional small tweak here and there in the future but yay. *blows out a breath* Not that this took a particularly long time (were it MY journal and not a roleplay one I'd dwell on it longer) but taffing with stylesheets can be brainmelting.

IC Meme

Thu, 15 Dec 2005 18:29:29 GMT

The Random Question Meme!

An array of completely random questions about my friends!

Can full__of__woe do a headstand?: Wednesday? Headstand? I don't know, Bog what a question. I suppose she can but it's not anything I'd want to viddy, I'm sure something dead would be involved. And it would eat me.
Did notreallyal_sry steal the cookie from the cookie jar?: Couldn't be.
What is oftheseashore's fantasy?: Play the tunes of Ludwig van and oobivat every veck in the world in a loving way? Hey, same as mine.
Of latrine_orderly and lookstasty, who would call shotgun first?: Excel. Definitely Excel.
Can dreamofhumanity solve a Rubik's Cube?: No, he'd just horn or cry over it in a pool of existential angst.
Where did manofsteal go?: How should I know? Good riddance.
How would flaming_moltres survive on a desert island?: He wouldn't.
Of mumblejumble_, not_sane_one, and u_jerk, which one is most similar to house_broken?: Rikuou has always been a doggie in my glazzies so. . .Rikuou.
Where would you take mymotherthegun on a vacation?: Oh, yessssssssssss. . .

This is by heptadecagram. You can find your own completely random questions here.

Do you feel enlightened now?

Thu, 08 Dec 2005 18:33:48 GMT

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Personality Disorder:	High
Schizoid Personality Disorder:	Low
Schizotypal Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Antisocial Personality Disorder:	Very High
Borderline Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Histrionic Personality Disorder:	Very High
Narcissistic Personality Disorder:	Very High
Avoidant Personality Disorder:	Low
Dependent Personality Disorder:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	Low
-- Take the Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Info --

. . .Geeze, it's so true too.

The People List/Relationship Meme

Tue, 06 Dec 2005 07:51:05 GMT

. . .I'm bored STFU. Anyway this is LIKE the relationship list but categorized and far less detailed. Just lists.

I consider you droogs and droogs stick together
-Son Goku

Not droogs but I won't go out of my way to tolchock you. You're okay by my book.
-~~Malcolm Reynolds~~
-Izumi Curtis
-Kon El
-Kuduo Kazahaya
-Yakushi Kabuto
-Toboe
-Excel
-Anon
-Fletcher Tringham

I entertain myself at your expense.
-Kira Yamato
-Seymour
-Huang Yue Ying
-Oscar Himejima

You rather annoy me.
-Dante Sparda
-Obi Wan Kenobi
-Megan
-Himura Rikuou

Sometimes I just wish you'd snuff it.
-Stanley Hihat Trinidad XIV
-Arsène Lupin III

. . .You hurt my mozg.
-Calanthe
-Bob the Angry Flower
-Umeda Hokuto
-Elphaba Thropp
-Wednesday Addams
-Excel
-Ash Ketchum

I totally thought you were a devotchka when we first met
-Rey za Burrel
-Ari
-Calanthe
-Caeru Meveny
-Yzak Jule
-Kira Yamato

I STILL think you're a devotchka.
-Rey za Burrel

I've flirted with you.
-Buffy Summers
-Rey za Burrel
-Femme!Lupin
-Femme!Goku
-Gothic Lolita!Goku
-Femme!Itachi
-Femme!Oscar
-Heather Morris
-Cheryl!Heather
-Kaylee Frye
-Kid!Kaylee
-Xiao Qiao
-Huang Yue Ying
-Naga
-George Lass
-Otomiya Haine
-Faith
-Lunamaria Hawke
-Fllay Allster
-Cher Horowitz
-Yamanaka Ino
-Luna Lovegood

We've kissed (I'm hetero, I swear!)
-Son Goku
-Femme!Lupin
-Rei Ayaname
-Erk
-Rey za Burrel
-Fletcher Tringham
-Arsène Lupin III
-Inui Sadaharu
-Excel
-Kabuto's Blissey

You've given me pain. A few razzes.
-Son Goku
-Stanley Hihat Trinidad XIV
-Kazahaya's Espeon
-Elphaba's Ninetales
-Obi Wan Kenobi
-Il Palazzo
-Excel
-Arsène Lupin III
-Stan's Haunter
-Malcolm Reynolds
-Gwendal von Walde
-Sasuke Uchiha
-River Tam (while he was Yellow)
-Anakin Skywalker
-Izumi Curtis

I've killed. . .
-Arsène Lupin III

I have successfully drugged you
-Himura Rikuou
-Kaylee Frye
-Seymour
-Kon El
-Tot
-Arsène Lupin III

These people have seen me nagoy.
-Obi Wan Kenobi
-Arsène Lupin III
-Izumi Curtis
-Kon El
-Kaylee Frye
-George Lass
-Kid!Rosalyn
-Megan

Okay, that said, post here if you want further details on Alex's thoughts about YOU! Be aware that "you are an idiot" is a sort of default setting. :3

The Ode doesn't kill people, Alex kills people

Thu, 01 Dec 2005 07:00:32 GMT

Alex has strong reactions to classical music so I decided to record the basics here:

Ludwig Van Beethoven's Ninth Symphony: In a league of its own. This is it, ladies and gentlemen, Alex's favorite piece. It fills him with a raw, very nearly sexual excitement and he can Rage off of it as well as he can Rage off of vellocet. If he listens to this he will either lie there in sexual bliss or attempt to knock off your head. Or first one then the other. If Alex is not feeling violent, he'll be lulled into hypnosis by it so you'll have to use your judgement as to wether or not you want to expose him to the Ode to Joy.

Crashing, emotional music: Classical especially. Alex gets sexual bliss from the classical music he hears. Canonically, he can acheive orgasm just by listening to it. . .yeah.

Christmas Carols: Never touched in the book but it is that time of year, huh? And when you find you're in a bind you just make some shit up. Crashing carols like "Carol of the Bells" can induce Rage and orgasm (though not to the extent of the Ninth); soft, melodious ballads like "Silent Night" lull him into a harmless, almost hypnotized state. Modern songs like "Jingle Bells" have no effect.

IC Survey

Wed, 23 Nov 2005 23:46:10 GMT

*TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey*
Name:	Alex
Birthday:	April 16, 2012
Birthplace:	London, England
Current Location:	Camp Sod You Snuff It. . .Erm. . .I mean Fuck You Die. In Lousiana, USA
Eye Color:	Robin's Egg Blue
Hair Color:	Brown. . .maybe auburn. Sometimes I like streak it. hair flip
Height:	5'6"
Right Handed or Left Handed:	Left rooker dominant by birth. Now ambidextrous.
Your Heritage:	British. But I think I have like some Navajo in me.
The Shoes You Wore Today:	Steel toed flip horrorshow boots for kicking.
Your Weakness:	mumblesMusic
Your Fears:	Hm? Have no fear, ever, I say. If fear thou hast in thy heart pray banish it forthwith O my brothers.
Your Perfect Pizza:	Eew. Vonny greasepile.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:	Escape Sod You Snuff It
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:	*Shark of Heaven is idle 6:32 pm
Thoughts First Waking Up:	I have a bit of a pain in my gulliver and am going back to bed.
Your Best Physical Feature:	My luscious glory. runs his fingers through his hair
Your Bedtime:	Bedtime?
Your Most Missed Memory:	Uh. . .
Pepsi or Coke:	Neither, both out!
MacDonalds or Burger King:	Ew!
Single or Group Dates:	Heheheh. . ."Group".
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:	tilts his head Chai tea?
Chocolate or Vanilla:	Vanilla
Cappuccino or Coffee:	Cappuccino
Do you Smoke:	Yes, and luxury cancers too.
Do you Swear:	Mmm. . .yep.
Do you Sing:	A little
Do you Shower Daily:	Of course I do. I need to be shining.
Have you Been in Love:	Uh. . .No.
Do you want to go to College:	Psh. Nah. Learning and thinking is for the gloopy ones.
Do you want to get Married:	Not so you'd notice.
Do you belive in yourself:	I suppose I do.
Do you get Motion Sickness:	mumble Yeah.
Do you think you are Attractive:	I am attractive.
Are you a Health Freak:	Not really. No.
Do you get along with your Parents:	Eh. . .They don't bother me I don't bother them.
Do you like Thunderstorms:	Yes.
Do you play an Instrument:	The piano some.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:	Mmmhmm
In the past month have you Smoked:	Yes.
In the past month have you been on Drugs:	Just last nochy even.
In the past month have you gone on a Date:	Define "date"? . . .wait, either way, no.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:	AHAHAHA!. . .no.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:	Nope.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:	Define "sushi"?
In the past month have you been on Stage:	No. Or yes, if Oscar's worldview counts as such.
In the past month have you been Dumped:	Physically yes.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:	I wish. No.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:	. . . . . . . .yes.
Ever been Drunk:	Often.
Ever been called a Tease:	Uh. . .Yeah.
Ever been Beaten up:	Frequently but usually I am the one that tolchocks.
Ever Shoplifted:	Yes.
How do you want to Die:	Don't really care. It like sloochats when it happens, right, right, right?
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:	Alive?
What country would you most like to Visit:	Utah
*In a Boy/Girl..*
Favourite Eye Color:	Don't care
Favourite Hair Color:	Don't care
Short or Long Hair:	Don't care
Height:	Don't care
Weight:	Don't care
Best Clothing Style:	Don't care
Number of Drugs I have taken:	Don't care
Number of CDs I own:	Don't care
Number of Piercings:	Don't care
Number of Tattoos:	Don't care
Number of things in my Past I Regret:	Don't care
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

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How Alex feels about the local wildlife and other threats

Sat, 05 Nov 2005 17:23:15 GMT

Because Mello is also a bad influence. And I am bored and I KNOW you all care.

Barrier

Or as Alex calls it "The Shest" (Shest is actually Nadsat for "pole" or "bar", but connotes the idea of being "barred in"). The barrier surrounds Camp and prevents people from leaving. Those who come into contact with it seem to suffer a wide range of consiquences. Alex didn't know it was there. In an event prior to his first post he claims to have made contact with it but his only "punishment" was that he was able to smell colors for about a day. This is probably true.

Basilisk

An event threat. Since he was in Yellow Mode for a good portion of this event, he considers it Somebody Else's Problem.

Bodyswitch

Alex is new to camp and doesn't really know anyone. He was aware that some people were acting funny but that's it. Another threat deemed Somebody Else's Problem by Alex.

Borg

In some ways this is an Alex-specific problem. There seems to be a sub-species of Borg indigenous to his computer. They yell at him and tease him, much like other computers in camp do to their owners. They also grant his computer immunity to certain camp viruses and auto-repair his machine each time he tries to destroy it. They communicate via "System Errors". Alex is fed up with them but ultimately prefers them over a normal camp computer.

Catboy Virus

Randomly turns people part Furry it seems. Alex was amused when it happened to Riddle.

Chibirus

Which makes you into a chibi. Always funny as long as it's not happening to him.

Confidence Bread

Alex's intense narcissism means that bread which boosts your self esteem "to insane levels" actually has no effect on him.

Curious Pinecones

It was Neji, I think, that first warned Alex that the pinecones in the trees often wound up in places that you wished they wouldn't. Alex later gave the same warning to Lupin saying that the pinecones "got a little curious". Ever since then he's called them Curious Pinecones, as have I, though there is absolutely no evidence in camp canon to suggest that this is actually what they are called. We're just cool like that.
Alex had one brief encounter with a pinecone when he was in the middle of beating on Kazahaya. It didn't get the chance to go very far before he rushed into a tree and knocked himself out. Then it rolled out of his pants.

Drencrom, Synthemesc, Vellocet and WHY IS SEYMOUR SETTING EXCEL ON FIRE!?

Anything involving milk-plus amuses Alex. Anything involving milk-plus is usually his fault.

Enter Player 2-or-The Dynasty Warrior Clones

Somebody Else's Problem.

Freudian Regression Gone Horribly Wrong-or-The Reverse Aging Epidemic

Somebody Else's Problem.

Gender Bender

Or "That disease that makes you switch gender". Another thing Alex gave his own name to. Alex got Genderbent after he turned into a Ticky Box (. . .). Sure enough, he was distracted by his own breasts. He did not really care about being a woman that much since he knew it was a Camp thing and that it went away eventually. It was Lupin that groped him back to health and that is what bothers Alex most about this whole ordeal.

The Gentlemen Crisis

Alex had only just arrived when the Gentlemen started stalking abroad. There were screams, people died, but he didn't know anyone yet and everyone was mute so he couldn't learn names. He eventually dubbed the whole bloody mess SEP (Somebody Else's Problem).

Ghost

While Alex still hasn't been to prison he still has a sort of whimpering fear of hands roaming his body so the groping ghost in the boy's bathroom creeps him out. He heard about it from Kon and chances are he will never encounter it as it is probably gone by now.

Gorillas

Alex has heard a great deal about the Gorillas who rape people that try to sneak into girl's cabins or are late for breakfast. But he usually doesn't even make it to breakfast he wakes up so late and he's snuck into girls' cabins (as in the time he got jumped and was makeup-attacked by Heather) before without ever encountering a single gorilla.

Halloween Curse

The curse that made people turn into their costumes turned Alex into a vampire. Some things about it he rather enjoyed like the ability to scale sheer walls, run stupidly fast, and throw people like they weighed nothing. Once daylight came, though, he changed his tune and just started angsting about it. He eventually slept off the rest of his curse in the shelter of Lupin's cabin wether Lupin wanted him to or not.

Hormonal Goats

Alex has yet to encounter or even hear of these.

Hotspring Transmutations

"Zwaaah?" asks Alex. Mostly Somebody Else's Problem.

Love Goo

Normally this would be Somebody Else's Problem but when Erk and Lupin got love gooed the first living creature they touched was Alex. Alex finds their affection amusing sometimes but mostly irritating and in the case of Lupin rather repulsive.

Magical Nightmares

Stan's Nightmares were not fun for poor Alex who wound up doing alot of sleepwalking, sleepdrinking, sleeptalking and sleepcrying. I left his dreams mostly unexplained, interpret what pieces you were able to pick out as you will. It was a dream. But he woke up into a synthemesc hallucination and jumped out of his tree in his confusion, breaking nearly every bone in his body. His hatred for Stan multiplied with this, even though he wasn't one of the spell's direct targets.

Pokerus

The disease that turns you into a pokemon. Now this has happened to Alex twice which, since I am a n00b, is just a little silly. Alex turns into a Sneasel, a pokemon with sharp claws, eye makeup, a love of eggs, and an overwhelming urge to beat things up and steal stuff. All in all it's not much different than his usual state so he kinda just goes with the flow when this happens to him. His personality changes a little when he turns into a Sneasel. Not hugely but his sense of humor becomes much more lame and reliant on terrible puns ala the humor in the Pokemon anime. Again, you do these things to amuse yourself. :/

Psychic Toucans

Has heard about them but has yet to encounter any.

Random Superpowers

Well, George with X-Ray vision was funny except Alex really WAS naked. Mostly Somebody Else's Problem.

Redneck Tree

In active game time Alex hasn't met any yet. He's mentioned seeing one briefly while a Sneasel but nothing happened to him. He has yet to encounter any in active game time or while human.

Seiten Goku

Run, you fools, this foe is beyond you!

Tentacle Monster

Alex has been to the lake twice and never encountered a single tentacle. He has, however, met the monster's baby Kal, which was born out of Kon (though at the time Kal was Murray the Demonic Skull). After hearing about the pregnancy from Buffy he got twitchy. The idea of a tentacle raping him and planting something in his stomach is unpleasant. I am sure you'd find it unpleasant too.

Ticky-Box

The Borg turned Alex into a Ticky-Box. He was not amused.

Tom Riddle

((He is too a camp threat STFU)). Alex has yet to figure out why everyone is afraid of Riddle beyond the creepy vibes. Somebody Else's Problem.

Velociraptors

Alex was the first to meet a velociraptor and so far only him and Lupin have seen any. Apparently they come by his tree sometimes but they usually keep to the deep woods and don't bother anyone.

Veronica Mars Bodymutation

Somebody Else's Problem

Vines

Alex has heard about the vines from a few people. He'd really like to know why all of the natural wildlife seems to have an infatuation with his ass. Or with asses in general.

What's With the Mangled Japanese? Mangled Russian is MUCH Funnier!

Made Alex giggle. Mostly Somebody Else's Problem.

White Oak Mistletoe

The Mistletoe on his tree has spread throughout camp, spreading its magic. People have to kiss under it whenever they pass beneath it. They can't help it. Alex isn't particularly fond of having grown men kiss him but he also can't completely argue against something that gives him an excuse to liplock with the ladies. What irritates him most is that he gets very into the kissing, whether with a man or a woman, that is induced by Mistletoe. Canonically, if something influences him it does so deeply and does a thorough job of it.

Yellow Sign

An event threat that targeted Alex first then, through him, the rest of Camp. After seeing the Yellow Sign Alex became a Priest of the tentacled deity Hastur and was given ridiculously powerful magic and the ability to call a Byakhee to his side. He managed to almost kill several people. Unfortunately, Alex himself was "asleep" throughout this in the back of the Yellow Priest's mind. He has no memory of what he did but he knows he did something terrible which worries him and slightly annoys him. If he really thrashed things the way people say he did he wants to REMEMBER damn it!

Zombies

Alex's app post is what I consider to be his first action at camp. Therefore, he has encountered one zombie so far and it messed up his hair then knocked him into the mud and made him cry. Obviously he does not much care for zombies.